Why Someone Else Can’t (or Shouldn’t) Organize Your House for You

by StephBuckwalter on August 1, 2010

Does the thought of someone else coming in and messing with your stuff horrify you? Do you resist it with all your being? Relax, that resistance can be a good thing. Sometimes, the right-brained, visual homemaker needs to organize her own things. This is not because she is the only one in the world who can do it, but simply because organizing is her way of processing information. The information being processed includes 1) seeing what you own and 2) seeing where you store it.

Now, if your house is super organized with a place for everything and everything in its place, then someone else can do that job for you and you won’t cringe. But if your organizational system is not quite fully developed (or totally lacking), then your desire to do the sorting and organizing is natural.

Think about this for a minute. When you bring a new item into your home, do you:

A) immediately find a home for it
B) set it aside and move on to the next thing on your to do list

If you answered B, then you never really ”processed” the item into your life. That’s where that cringing sensation comes from when someone offers to help you get organized. So next time you feel yourself cringing, don’t fight it, just process your own stuff!

(c) 2010 Stephanie Buckwalter

  • forHishouse

    I read this article and was astounded how this spoke of the very challenge I have! I had my husband read this & it really helped him to understand that I’m not a control-freak and choose to be independent, simply because I won’t let others help me declutter or pack up our house. I love to organize & am actually pretty good at it (actually I’m better at helping others!). Being a visual & hands-on person requires that I be part of the organizing & sorting process. This makes SO much sense! Thank you Stephanie! This just may have saved our marriage!

  • forHishouse

    okay, now I have a question for all you right-brainers out there! How many of you own a roll-top desk, and how many of you actually use it? I have a beautiful one that I just HAD to have. It has all the wonderful cubby holes & drawers, which is what attracted me to it in the first place. I love containers, BUT I am coming to realize that I actually need my stuff out in the open, or I forget about it. My desk frequently gets cluttered & is unuseable. It simply has become a pile zone. When I sit at the desk, the sides & drawers/cubbies in front of me make me feel closed in, so I don’t feel comfortable sitting there. All the file and side drawers simply became storage for office supplies. I really think that a plain desktop or tabletop would be best for me. A pencil cup and a simple small file holder for active files would work well. Have any of you experienced something similar? I don’t look forward to telling my husband that I don’t want it afterall & that he gets to move this heavy thing again!

  • StephanieBuckwalter

    It took me years to understand this myself. A few years into our marriage, I wondered why my husband would not help me with any major household clean up and one day he told me that whenever he tried to help, I would not like it or would get mad because he would get rid of something or move something I wanted. He finally left it all to me. And there’s the rub. Since I insisted on doing it my way, I forfeited help from him. Once I realized that, I started to process my stuff in earnest.

  • StephanieBuckwalter

    LOL. I always wanted a rolltop desk but never got one. I just cleaned up my desk last night. I was definitely tucked away in my own little world when I sat down to use the computer, tucked between piles of papers and stuff. The office is my final frontier.

Previous post:

Next post: